I am lucky enough to have some fantastic single women friends. Women who have found themselves single when their husbands suddenly decided after many years of marriage that they needed to go "find themselves". What they really meant was they needed to go "find themselves another woman"....or man as the case may be... (don't ask)... all I can say is that the male mid-life crisis is REAL and it's a scary thing! But, these lovely friends of mine have persevered and you know what....? They are the sweetest, funniest, most genuine and down to earth women I know. What we have all realized together is that being single is really O-K!!
So now I ask.... what is with all these desperate women whose main
priority in life is to find a man and then swoon all over him and cater
to him and overlook or make excuses for his sometimes very OBVIOUS
issues? Issues like what he really wants is a MOTHER or someone to prop
up his fragile little ego or his constant need for reassurance or
attention... BLECCH!!
All you "together" single women out there... you
know the kind of "man" (and I use the term loosely) I am talking about, right?? The man who
has so many insecurities that he blames all his problems on the world,
or his career (or lack thereof) or his ex-wife/girlfriend, or not being
breast-fed as an infant or some other lame-ass bullshit. The man who
will not take responsibility for his own life and expects a woman to
"complete" him... double BLECCH!! The sad thing is that there are women
who will run to these sorry impersonators of the male species and spend
their lives trying to figure out how to make these losers happy. Well, I
don't know about you but I have WAY more interesting things to do with
the rest of my life, and baby-sitting a grown man is not one of them!
Don't get me wrong, I LOVE men. In fact, I think I may soon write a list
of all the things I love about men, just to give the good guys their
recognition! I have noticed that the men who are my friends have some
common traits:
- They are self-assured without being self-absorbed
- They have the ability to laugh at themselves and not take themselves soooo
seriously
- They are intelligent but not arrogant or pompous
- They don't feel the world owes them something
- They are kind and show genuine empathy for others
- They are not afraid to get out on the dance floor for fear of who may be watching!
- Most importantly, they are genuinely HAPPY with who they are and where they are
Being a single, unencumbered and happy woman these days is very empowering and so I have raised the bar on my expectations of a potential partner. I know what I want.. more importantly, I know what I DON'T want. In the meantime... the single life?? It rocks!
- Jayne Manning
Toronto, Ontario, Canada